Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Thoughts on Date Your Wife

Date your Wife by Justin Buzzard is essentially a call for men to step up and actively and intentionally nurture their wife in all areas of their relationship and part of this is done by taking the initiative and responsibility to "date your wife".... basically, that men (and women) spend so much time and effort winning the woman of their dreams and once that phase is accomplished... that effort and care can be lost in the daily mundane existence of married life.

I'm not sure I agreed 100% with some of his assertions, for instance, is it really the man's fault if his wife is unhappy or not "flourishing" under his care? I'm just not sure the blame can be completely centered on the husband. But there are some practical ideas on incorporating a "date night" in this book as well as a well-written articulation of WHY this is so important. He presents this as a very thought out, intentional year long plan, addressing birthdays, mother's day, a weekly time away for the wife to go out, weekly dates, a longer weekend away with no kids, and a vacation with the whole family. In his sample plan (with 3 kids) he writes in the amount of money each excursion is projected to cost, noting at the end that a bit over 2,000 for date nights/vacations is completely worth it. And I agree.

This book is a good, gentle "push" for men to be intentional about their marriage. At the end of the book Taylor, Justin Buzzard's wife, chimes in about how the wives are the "dream girls" of their spouse and to work hard at maintaining and enhancing that.

All in all, a good book and very solid. As a person that has been married for nearly 20 years, I did laugh a bit that the author has been married for around 7 years but his advice is still solid and I think it can enhance and protect marriages. A worthy book to read and I'd recommend it to a small group setting or to be read individually. I think it would be a fun book to read in a group setting and spark some good discussions and creative ways of 'dating' as well as perhaps encouraging a small group to help swap babysitting and elevating the need for a consistent date night in a marriage.

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