At night my mind swirls with questions. Some deeply personal and emotional, others highly rational. Most is a reflection of the day, and usually I'll also revisit in my mind the pages of books I've read that day or week, which often fill me with more questions.
First, I am not sure I mentioned on my blog I'm in the middle of a 6 week sabbatical from volunteering at church. Sounds kinda stupid, doesn't it? A sabbatical from volunteering! But it is nearly like 'detox' in some ways; so entwined is my Christian faith with serving. Not sure if that's bad or good but it in many ways has become bad, so a few weeks of reflection and (theoretically) refreshment is probably a good thing.
But instead my mind is abuzz with questions and here it is, after midnight!
First, an easier one: What is discipleship? What does that word truly mean? I've read books, I probably have a fairly good idea of what it is but I think we use that word very, very differently and I'd love to really know what it means to disciple someone. My favorite definition is perhaps too passive, but is is simply allowing others access to your life, so they can shadow you as you shadow Christ. Yet I've heard others advocate a more programmed, 6 week, detached form of discipleship where the person gets access to your wisdom to speak into their lives but they don't actually get access to shadow you or even get to know you through example. Is that discipling or counseling/mentoring?
Second, I've been reading a book on the church. Nothing new; I read several books on church every year. And this one is not groundbreaking in what it has to say, but the author says it well. It is a good reminder of the Gospel and how the Gospel shapes the church.
I just finished a chapter on community and I loved what he had to say, but it made me so very sad because I don't think that true community the way he describes can truly exist. I think we've settled for basing it on commonalities that are shallow and I am not sure what it really means to really embrace the Gospel and allow it to inform every aspect of life.