Sunday, October 11, 2009
I love Sundays! it's funny because a few short years ago I really did not love Sundays; I went out of obligation. I'd use any excuse I could to not listen in "big church". I did not like singing. I did not like the preaching. I did not like anything! (Disclaimer: This is not at the church I now attend!) I truly felt that I was "going through the motions". I had enough "background knowledge'.... I knew all my Bible stories, had a year of Bible College, grew up "church" and did enough impressive stuff that I could look and sound the part but it was all pretense.
I wrote yesterday about volunteering and how much "better" it is when one can volunteer in an area they are gifted/talented or passionate in. I do believe this and yet, I also see merit in serving just because it needs to be done, but as a friend (Sarah W) pointed out to me in an online chat, that so often can lead to burnout. It's fine and admirable to help out in whatever needs to be done short term, but not so much long time. She brought up John 15 and likened "saying no" to certain volunteer jobs as "pruning"... and preparing us or releasing us to perhaps do what He intended all along. I like that. It makes sense. We also admitted that we were both "people pleasers" and sometimes it's not GOD telling us to volunteer but our own desire to help or be liked or looked upon favorably.
Another point she brought up: Sometimes when we serve in an area we don't "love" or are talented in, it stops someone who may truly BE talented or passionate in to step forward, thinking that all the "needs" are covered and they are unnecessary. I don't think it's WRONG to serve in a capacity one is not gifted in; I just think it's just so much more joyful to know I'm serving in something that I love and feel excited about. Plus, as another online friend pointed out; God can use us in whatever way we are willing; and yet I KNOW that I try to do things on my own instead of waiting on Him.
It does perplex me at times that I was more "involved" in structured volunteering at my old church even though I wasn't truly following God than I am now at this church I love, attempting to serve this wonderful God I love, but struggling to find a place where I fit in to volunteer.
Why is that?
Things are changing though; I'm finally starting to realize what I do love and seeing that perhaps there is a "place" for a strange person like me in the body of Christ; but I still so often wish I was truly talented or gifted in ways that I deem as "better". I'll never learn to be content I guess!
My point? I have none. It's nearly midnight. Oh, wait! My point is that I love my church! I love the people, the opportunities, the message, the worship, EVERYTHING!
I know; this post makes absolutely NO sense! So I'll end here and just ask you: Why do you love your church? Do you anticipate Sunday? or are you ambivalent? or dreading it?
Posted by victoria at 10/11/2009 12:02:00 AM